A compassionate person is moved by another person’s situation and responds with acts of kindness, mercy and love. If someone were to suddenly fall down on the street, compassionate people would typically not just look and stare but run to their assistance. However if that person who had fallen had been shot by a police officer in a gun chase we might be afraid to run to their assistance, fearing our own safety.

Information and understanding about a situation can suddenly change our response. Knowledge and understanding can affect whether or not we are compassionate to our fellow human beings.  In fact, compassion is in many ways dependent on what we know, what we understand and what we believe to be true.

I’ll give you an example. Many people in the world suffer from depression. Some people see depression as a mental illness. Some people see depression as a sign of weakness. People who see depression as a sign of weakness typically don’t understand why depressed people can’t just “get over it!”

I have personally suffered from depression so I understand the symptoms, the darkness and I understand how you have to fight this illness. My compassion comes from a place of understanding and experience, not a place of moral superiority.

Jesus teaches us not to judge: “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” Luke 6:37

I believe we all need to pray for the ability for our love to not be held hostage by our lack of understanding and compassion.

Let me give you another example.

A few years ago there was a young woman in her early twenties raped and killed by a man in my community. The day after her murder the newspaper ran a story with the words of her parents as the headline. The headline read: “We forgive him!” This family was a devout, Christian family and they explained to the reporters who wrote the story that they would not deny the man that raped and killed their daughter the forgiveness they desired from God. This story has remained in my mind, imprinted on my heart. What an amazing act of love and mercy! It’s easy to have a heart that hurts for this family, but how do you feel about the rapist?

The news coverage around this case ultimately told us more about the rapist. The rapist, a young man, had been violently sexually abused as a child. In fact the social workers reported that they had never handled such a horrible case of sexual abuse. They tried to help him, but unfortunately they did not succeed. Would he have raped and killed a woman if he had not been violated himself? How do you now feel about the rapist?

Stories like this convince me why it’s so important to try NOT to let our love be held captive by feelings or a lack of compassion. Can we love and forgive when we feel angry or confused? Can we suspend judgment realizing that it’s impossible to truly understand another person’s pain and situation.

I’ll give you another example.

I met a young man at a youth hospice who asked me “do you do drugs?” I said, “no I don’t do drugs”. He told me, “I never met a chick that didn’t do drugs!” For a second my shock was somewhat mitigated by the amusement that this teenager was calling me a woman over 40, a chick, as I felt more like a “mother hen”. My heart went out to him that he was trapped in a world of drugs. Then he explained that on the weekends he did drugs with his mother. This additional information caused my heart to hurt even more.

If we truly understood the pain of our neighbours, we would likely love them more, but in the absence of that understanding how do we love them? Is love dependent on knowing the intimate details of our neighbours lives?

I believe the answer to that question must be no!

The type of love that Jesus is calling us to embrace is not an emotion it’s a choice! It’s a choice to pray for criminals. We can hate the crime, but we must pray for the offender. What if we were that offender? What if that offender were our child? Wouldn’t we want someone praying for us or our child?

It’s love to suspend judgment on another person. I remember reading in the newspaper a suicide note written by a suicide bomber saying goodbye to his wife and children. I don’t understand how people can believe that God is calling them to kill other people because I know God is love and that He wills for us to love and protect one another, but I choose to pray for suicide bombers and my heart hurts for them and the victims they kill and I encourage you to open your heart and pray for them too.

Compassion is not always possible, but love is always possible if we choose to pray for all souls regardless of their circumstances, regardless of their sins, irrespective of who they are and what they have done.

“And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that.” Luke 6:33