Jesus said to His disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” Matthew 16:24

In a world that preaches self-indulgence the idea of denying oneself may sound like something painful and unpleasant, but I have discovered a secret mystery about denial that I want to share with you.

Years ago I was searching for a new career. I had been in the business world for over 20 years and I really wanted to recommit my skills to humanitarian work. So with the support of my husband I decided to leave the corporate world to find a new path. I decided to take a risk and leave a high paying job in search of what I knew would be a lower paying job in the hope that I would feel more personally fulfilled.

What I wasn’t expecting was that this transition would completely change my life. The job I was looking for didn’t materialize and what I experienced for the first time in a long time was–SILENCE! I was alone in a totally quiet house. The silence was initially, I will be honest with you, quite disturbing. I wondered did I make a terrible mistake leaving the corporate world. I began to worry that I would not find the path I was looking for.

Jesus had a plan for me and this plan involved me learning this Scripture:

“Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.” Psalm 46:10

I had never studied the Bible, but in this new found quiet of my life, I decided I would try to learn God’s Word.

I slowly began to realize God wanted some time with me. I was not going to be rushing into another job immediately and fortunately while we were not wealthy, my husband could keep putting food on the table while I commenced down a path with God I had not anticipated.

When I was a little girl I received a little jewelry box that had a little ballerina inside and when you opened the box she spinned really fast. I realized that in some ways I had become the spinning ballerina. I was moving really fast but I wasn’t making any real spiritual progress. In my case I was also unevangelized and spiritually ignorant. I had never studied God’s Word and I wasn’t going to Church. So God in His wisdom took my hand and created some quiet time that allowed me to stop spinning really fast and see His light.

Time is precious and in the world in which we live we may feel like there is never enough time to do everything we want to do. And where does this rushed, stressed feeling come from? Is it possible that it comes from an orientation where we are always trying to indulge ourselves with some sort of pleasure?

Ok – I promised I would share with you the mystery that I discovered and this is it:

When I finally began to deny myself and shift my priorities to focus on God, God began to indulge me!

I realized that I was “the cup that was full” and in order for God to fill me up with His Spirit and grace I needed to first prepare room for Him, i.e., the cup needed to be emptied.

The silence that at first felt uncomfortable ultimately became sweet and peaceful. God’s quiet but powerful presence filled my life and a calm that I had never experienced filled my heart and my mind. I knew I was in the holy presence of God and that presence was awesome. I knew that God wanted to teach me His Way and His Will and that the spiritual transformation that He had in mind for me required that I be still and know that He is God.

In this quiet time of reflection, God taught me about the spiritual war between good and evil. I learned about the many ways Satan deceives souls and keeps them away from God. I had even seen Satan’s slogans printed on the city buses: “There is probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life.”

I am embarrassed to tell you how much of my life I have spent worrying. But I rejoice in telling you that I no longer worry because I now trust Jesus completely. God has embraced me. I am safe in His arms. I have found the purpose I was looking for. I understand that I have a role to play in God’s plan of salvation as do you and every believer of Jesus Christ.

Denial is the emptying of the soul of all the worldly attractions that separate us from God. It doesn’t mean that we never go to the movies again or to a restaurant but it does mean that everything we do God can participate in. It also means that we have to make quiet time to discover the meaning of God’s Word in our life. We have to quietly humble ourselves to pray for His grace and we should seek to remove everything that gets in the way of our relationship with God. That may mean shutting off your cellphone, shutting off the music and television and going on a quiet escape with God. And that escape can occur daily in as little time as a few moments as we tell Jesus, Our God, we love Him and that we want to give Him all that we have.

When we begin to deny ourselves and prepare room for the Spirit of God to penetrate our hearts and our minds with His Holy Will and infinite tenderness, we are slowly and surely transformed. We begin to desire the things that God desires. We want to help other people find faith in God and purpose in life. We start praying not just for ourselves but for all souls, especially souls that are offending God and that are in greatest need of His mercy.

All souls belong to God. We are all His creatures, but to become His children we must be blessed by the Spirit of adoption; God’s Holy Spirit must enter our hearts. “So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba, Father.” Romans 8:15

I realize what a great responsibility faith has.    “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.” Luke 12:48

One of the most important things God urged me to do is meditate daily on the Passion of His Son, Jesus Christ. I think of meditation as “prayer in listening mode”. When we contemplate the Passion of Our Saviour we contemplate His great love and that contemplation sears the Holy Name of Jesus upon our hearts.

“I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine.” Song of Solomon 6:3

Jesus thank You for creating the quiet in my life. Thank You for opening the Holy Scriptures to me and teaching me about the greatness of Your love. Saying thank You for dying for our salvation seems so inadequate. I don’t know how to say thank You enough to You, so please help me, my sweet Saviour, to make my life a proclamation of my love for You, a continuous prayer of thanksgiving for Your endless love that captures my heart and my imagination in ways that I cannot express.

“Denial” is often thought of in a negative context, but what I have discovered is that denial is a sacred key that opens the door to “spiritual awareness” as we close the doors to the noise and distractions of the world. God will not scream His will to us. He waits for us to open the door to our hearts to Him and prepare room for Him to work His plan of redemption and restoration. Only when we become still and know that He is God, will God enter to teach us and guide us so we can honour Him by learning to follow Him.

“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13

Do you think you could find some time (even a few precious moments) to be with Jesus in prayer daily at the time He died for our salvation 3pm? Join Christians all over the world that are stopping to honour Our Lord for dying for us by praying at the time He died for us 3pm (in our local time zones) as we quietly contemplate the Passion of Christ. I promise you the Passion of Christ will change your heart if you are willing to deny yourself and look at Him who gave up everything for you!  God will answer our prayers.  Let us pray for the mercy of Jesus upon all souls.  God will answer our prayers!  Learn more here.